When speaking to Dr. Janet Williams, Vice President of the School of Health Sciences at William Carey University, on my “Empowering Women in Educational Leadership” November 1st episode, she said too many people spend time comparing themselves to others.  The key is to stop looking around and focus on your own growth confidence, and your own journey.


In the age of social media and constant connectivity, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing our lives to those of others. We often find ourselves scrolling through perfectly curated feeds, feeling like we’re falling short in comparison. But here’s the truth: comparing ourselves to others is a recipe for unhappiness and self-doubt. In this blog, we’ll explore the importance of stopping the comparison game, shifting our focus inward, and working on our growth gaps, building confidence, and finding pride in the life we’re living.

The Illusion of Comparison

We’ve all heard the saying, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” and it couldn’t be truer. When we compare ourselves to others, we’re only seeing the surface of their lives—the highlights, the carefully chosen moments they share with the world. We don’t see the struggles, insecurities, or failures that they may be experiencing behind closed doors.

1. Unrealistic Expectations: Constantly comparing ourselves to others sets unrealistic expectations. We begin to believe that we should have what they have, do what they do, and be as successful or happy as they appear to be.

2. Undermining Self-Worth: Comparisons often lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. When we feel like we don’t measure up, it erodes our self-confidence and self-worth.

3. Missed Opportunities for Growth: While we’re busy looking at what others are doing, we may neglect our own growth gaps and opportunities for self-improvement.

Shift Your Focus Inward

1. Identify Your Growth Gaps: Instead of comparing yourself to others, turn your attention to your own life. Identify areas where you’d like to grow, both personally and professionally. Set goals and create a plan to work on them.

2. Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. Remember that nobody is perfect, and we all have our own challenges and setbacks.

3. Build Confidence: Confidence is built through taking action and achieving small wins. Focus on your strengths and accomplishments, no matter how minor they may seem. Each success adds to your confidence reservoir.

4. Celebrate Your Journey: Embrace your unique path in life. Recognize that everyone’s journey is different, and there’s no one-size-fits-all definition of success or happiness. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may appear to others.

Find Pride in Your Life

1. Gratitude: Cultivate a sense of gratitude for what you have in your life. When you focus on the positive aspects, it becomes easier to appreciate your own journey.

2. Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness to stay present and connected to your own experiences. It helps you avoid getting lost in the comparison game and allows you to fully enjoy the moments that matter.

3. Seek Support: Surround yourself with people who lift you up and support your growth. Share your aspirations with those who genuinely care about your well-being.


It’s time to stop looking around and start looking within. The constant comparison to others only holds us back from realizing our true potential and finding contentment in our own lives. Instead of fixating on what others have, let’s focus on our growth gaps, build our confidence, and take pride in the unique journey we’re on.

Remember, your path is yours alone, and it’s filled with opportunities for personal growth, happiness, and fulfillment. Embrace it and make the most of every moment. For guidance along your journey, reach out to me for a free consultation at www.drstephanieduguid.com, I would love to help you!